New life, new me?

We keep talking about intercultural competences acquired through workshops and seminars, but in the end it's either yo have it, or you don't. Who taught the poor immigrant women who are looking after an old person in a foreign country what a cultural shock is and how can you manage it? Which are the levels of intercultural sensitivity and how can you become more tolerant toward others?
I remember having met on an Italian train two Romanian women who had come to Italy a few years before. Once they discovered I was Romanian, they started to reveal me their secrets. "I love preparing pesto for the woman I'm working for, but when she turns her back I always add more basil and olive oil. She has no idea about this, but she goes crazy about it!" I could see in her eyes that she simply loved it.
Of course, many things lay behind this happy image. Living abroad means having to deal with the lack of your family and friends; beside openness, it even involves the possibility that your openness might change you into a somehow different person. At the beginning, it all looks so fascinating and you feel that you've always wanted your life to be like that. Finally, you have reached your goal: new friends, new job, new food... Then, something belonging to your inner culture, that you most probably hated before, starts to yell for new attention. And you find yourself missing the things that you couldn't even bear when you were at home. Surpassing this moment cannot be taught. That's why when someone asks me how come I don't miss home, I don't know what to answer. I do miss home, a lot, but I'm just too curious to give up at all the lovely possibilities that await me.